Kat Von D’s ‘High Voltage Tattoo’

We have a new ‘coolest book in the store’ as of today. This.

High Voltage Tattoo is a graphic perspective on today’s global tattoo culture by Kat Von D, star of The Learning Channel’s L.A. Ink and one of the most talented and popular artists working today. Designed in a style that is reminiscent of a handmade Gothic journal with its red padded cover, ornate typography, and parchmentlike pages, it throws the door wide open to tattooing culture in the way only an insider like Kat can.

High Voltage Tattoo traces Kat’s career as an artist, from early childhood influences to recent work, along with examples of what inspires her, information about the show and her shop, her sketches, and personal tattoos. The book goes deep into tattoo process and culture: readers can see up close the pigments, the tools, and the making of complex, even collaborative, tattoos.

With a foreword by Mötley Crüe’s Nikki Sixx, the book features images and stories about celebrities, rockers, pro skaters, and everyday citizens, including Slayer’s Kerry King, Anthrax’s Scott Ian, Margaret Cho, Jackass’ Bam Margera, David Letterman, and many others. It profiles and showcases the work of artists Kat has selected from all over the world, her interviews with people who have compelling tattoos and stories, and amazing images of extraordinary tattoo work. Numerous portfolios throughout the book showcase a range of relevant subjects, from the black and gray portrait work for which Kat is famous to a popular tattoo theme, such as the rose or biblical images. There is a knockout ten-page full-body spread of Kat—clad in a yellow bikini and seven-inch, rhinestone-studded red stilettos—that catalogs in detail all her personal tattoos on her front, back, left, and right sides—even her hands and head.

Contact us to reserve your copy. Join our Book Club to Buy 1 Get 1 Half Price.

Dignitas Gift Vouchers Now Available!

We are pleased to announce that we have made arrangements with Dignitas in Switzerland, and ICETWICE Gift Vouchers may now be used to give irritating co-workers, noisy neighbours, over-enthusiastic council employees, or late-paying clients a dignified end.

Actually, we made that up, it’s not true, so, Dignitas, please don’t sue us?

However, you may purchase ICETWICE Gift Vouchers and give them as Christmas presents.

Surely this surely cannot offend anyone?

Go HERE for details!

Or call us on 01234 714499

Love from ICETWICE
xxxx

Vaclav Klaus. Vaclav Klaus. Vaclav Klaus. Yay.

I urge you to sign a crucial petition that the Taxpayers’ Alliance is running. As you may know, there is now only one man standing between the Lisbon Treaty (formerly known as the EU constitution) and ratification: President Vaclav Klaus of the Czech Republic. President Klaus has come under huge pressure from the EU and other European leaders to sign the Treaty, but so far he has held out in the face of all the threats and incentives that have been offered to him.
 
Every single main party promised us a referendum at the last General Election, but we have been denied it. The TPA is running a petition to send a message of support to President Klaus, and to urge him to hold out until we get that vote that we were promised. By contrast to our own leaders, who have betrayed their promise, he is sticking his neck out for our democracy as well as his own, so the least we can do is to express our thanks and express our support for him to continue his valiant action.

Thank you for your support, please do sign the petition here…
Stand Firm President Klaus

…and forward this page on to all of your friends and family – the more people who sign, the better our chance of getting that referendum.

A Day In The Life….November 09

Well, the response to last month’s announcement that we will be closing during November & December, in protest at the transformation of Christmas into a mere consumerist ritual, has been nothing short of revelatory.

A sweet little old lady hailing from Newton Blossomville wrote to me pleading for clemency. I am much moved by her plight. She fears she will be unable to buy the vicar his traditional present, (a book of erotic photography), if I am shut for two months.

Taking this tear-jerking tale into account, the upshot is that all plans to leave you poor folk without a destination for Christmas presents, have been, in a word, abandoned. We shall be OPEN for business, and what is more, I am considering heartfelt pleas from sobbing shift-workers for us to stay open 24 hours a day so they don’t miss out on the opportunity to peruse our cornucopia of delights. Hang on, that makes it sound like we retail confectionery, which is one of the few things we don’t offer.

What we do now sell, to be specific, is things like this. Baby pink Moleskines. Actually, we sell all types of Moleskines in all sorts of colours but I’m focussing on the pink ones because they are so jolly photogenic, as you can see.

What else? Well, since you ask (don’t deny it, I’m not fooled), we have fabulous new photography from the very talented and utterly local Ed Lee. Here’s one, of Whitby North Pier. I understand that Whitby is not local, before you write in. Ed’s into lighthouses at the moment, which is good, because lighthouses are, I am told, quite zeitgeisty. Beacons of hope, and so on and so forth.

I must tell you at this point that I get regular enquiries from concerned parents, as to what they should buy male teenagers for Christmas. (Females are easy, see pink Moleskines above). “Something inspiring please,” they say, “but not a computer game, and not rude, and not socks.” This limits the available choices, but, I have the answer. They’re all obsessed by Banksy, yet they already own the entire Banksy oeuvre, however they do not have THIS, coz it’s new. The London Street Art Anthology. There we are, problem solved. Relax, and call me to reserve 7 or 8 copies forthwith.

Teenagers dealt with then. Splendid. Who else? Impossibly grumpy old gits. We all have at least one in our immediate family. (I am the one in mine). Get them this. ‘1001 Ridiculous Ways To Die’. The largest collection of hilarious true stories chronicling the most ridiculous, bizarre and astonishingly stupid deaths. They’ll expire laughing, shortly after lunch on Christmas Day with any luck, then you can enjoy The Queen in the diary room on Festive Big Brother without fear of interruption. Sorted. Tada!

Simon’s Cat, Blast It

I can’t believe I’ve done this. My friend Fiona told me I must order ‘Simon’s Cat’ books for our bookstore because they will sell like the proverbial hot cakes. I fought against it, because it’s probably crass and populist, but I’ve succumbed. So, I regret to tell you, I really do bitterly regret to tell you, that ‘Simon’s Cat is now available at ICETWICE. You probably won’t want it, because you’re sophisticated and elitist and far too cool to be seen with a copy, even a copy in an opaque polythene bag, but there we are, it’s done now, and I must suffer the consequences. Am appalled by self, truly appalled.

Postman Pat rules out strike action!

We should like to point out that there is absolutely no truth in the rumour doing the rounds (groan) that Postman Pat will be joining the strike action planned for this Thursday and Friday.

Also, he wishes it to be known that many titles featuring The Man Himself are now available for purchase at ICETWICE.

All Buy 1 Get 1 Half Price to Book Club members!

ICETWICE
01234 714499

P.S. Jess says Miaow. There’s a surprise.

Getty Images now available at ICETWICE!

ICETWICE are very pleased to announce that we are now the exclusive local distributor for Getty Images.

We now have access to thousands of iconic images drawn from the incomparable Hulton Archive and Getty’s contemporary collection. From Ali to Audrey, fashion to film to sport, pioneering reportage to futuristic interiors, we have access to the photographs that have illuminated modern history, images that will always inspire, provoke, challenge, haunt and delight.

To view the collection go here:

DISCOUNTS FOR ICETWICE BOOK CLUB MEMBERS!!!

Box Clever with FATBOY

One of the tricky things about FATBOY beanbags is that they arrive in very very big boxes, and, let’s not try to ignore the problem, these are not easy to squirrel away under the stairs before Christmas.

They are going to be discovered. So, here’s our solution, order from ICETWICE by the end of October and we will store them for you free of charge until just before Christmas Day, AND, we’ll give you a 10% discount on the usual price!

We’d suggest you box clever and take us up on it immediately, but that would be impertinent. We prefer to let you decide for yourself, in your own time, that it’s a no-brainer.

P.S. Keep the box. Ideal for storing unruly children after Christmas lunch!

In Memoriam….

Well, we’ve taken down the offending banners on the front of the building, which, we’ll have you know, The Enforcement Officer described in his letter to us as “gaudy” Here’s the wikisaurus definition of gaudy:

“Very showy or ornamented, now especially when excessive, or in a tasteless or vulgar manner”

The Enforcement Officer, bless him, very diligently sent us all the relevant rules and regulation, and we joyously pored over The Town and Country Planning (Control of Advertisements) (England) Regulations 2007, and discovered that there is a, what’s the word, loophole, no, not loophole, enormous cavity in Part 1, Section 2.

“Interpretation
2.—(1) In these Regulations— “the Act” means the Town and Country Planning Act 1990;
“advertisement” does not include—
(a) anything employed wholly as a memorial or as a railway signal”

Now, I grant you, putting a railway signal on our facade would be pretty pointless, and I don’t propose to do this. But, a Memorial To The Sad Demise Of Common Sense seems an altogether more attractive idea. It might even look like this, and I defy anyone to describe it as tasteless, vulgar, showy or ornamented. Understated, discreet and muted, possibly, the other words, no.

A Day In The Life…October 2009

Right. I’ve had enough. I’m not cooperating with all this Christmas nonsense any more. Stand by for an announcement that may very well cause you to quake in your Uggs or Hunter wellies or whatever other frippery you park on the business end of your lower limbs.

We hereby require ALL Christmas shopping at ICETWICE to be completed by October 31st.

All the ballyhoo and blather associated with this ridiculously outmoded quasi-religious neo-pagan consumerist ritual, has got to stop and stop now. It’s got out of hand. Therefore, as a principled protest against it all, we shall be SHUTTING for November and December, so if you haven’t taken full advantage of the vast array of irresistible goods on offer in our magnificently appointed emporium by 5pm on the aforementioned date you will have jolly well missed the boat, AND the last bus home, AND very possibly blotted your copybook to boot, into the bargain and up to the hilt. Obviously this means I have to shovel enough money into my till during the next four weeks to tide me through the last two months of the year, so you’ll have to step up and stump up, and we don’t want any whinging thank you very much. Omelette, eggs, breaking, etc.

I fully expect this decree to have a positive effect on the entire nation’s collective psyche, and I shall be quite cross if the rest of Britain’s shopkeepers don’t follow suit. I’ve left voicemails for Sirs Stuart Rose and Phillip Green demanding that they fall in line pretty pronto and present a united front, and, if they refuse, I shall be, well, miffed is not too strong a word.

To encourage you in this proud endeavour, I am prepared to stay open a bit later than 5.00pm if there are queues of you still at the till when it’s time to shut, but I must ask you to please be organised and have your cash handy and neatly folded, ready for pressing punctually into my hand. Try not to chatter too much to the other customers because they must concentrate all their efforts on not dropping their gargantuan pile of shopping. If you need trolleys, I know they have loads of them at the Co-op and Tesco and I doubt they’ll mind too much if you borrow one for a bit. If they have a problem with that, take my advice, send a stiff letter to their MD, with a copy to Mark Lancaster MP.

If you’re uncertain what to buy, because you’re used to leaving it all until December 24th, hoping inspiration will kick in, give me a bell or email me, and I’ll suggest some things. I don’t want you complaining at my choices though. You can’t very well cry for help and then object when I tell you that what Granny would really like is a Penis Pokey book (a mere £7.99), and that Uncle Gerald is extremely keen on R. Crumb’s Heroes of Blues, Jazz & Country (underpriced at £9.99, with free CD).

Now, one more thing. If you MUST insist on having a Christmas tree, ditch the old-fashioned three dimensional version, and get one of these, from us of course. A 6 foot tall two dimensional cardboard cut-out tree. Very cost and space effective, complete with baubles and a decent selection of pressies to make it look as though you have loads of friends and are very popular. A snip at £30. Place orders now please because otherwise they won’t be here by end of October, and then your lovely serene family day on December 25th will be absolutely ruined and it will be, frankly, all, your, fault.

Happy Quasi-Religious Neo-Pagan Consumerist Ritual.

This article was first published in The Times Ecumenical Supplement on April 1st 2009